Thursday, 26. August 2010
Ever since Hard Knocks started on HBO, my desire to watch Top Chef Season 7 is fading. Fast. Both shows are on at the same time, but because I can watch the East Coast version of Top Chef, I press on.
Last night I was actually intrigued by the challenge because one of my favorite pastimes is going baseball games. Admittedly, the best part of this pastime is the beer and food. While I do think the Dodger Dog is somewhat overrated, there’s still something so satisfying about drinking a $10 beer with a 10-foot long hot dog on a scorching Saturday afternoon.
Laef and I were just discussing our plans to see the San Diego Padres play at St. Louis in September and we had the following exchange:
Me: “Maybe we should eat at Subway before the game so we have more beer money.”
Laef: “Good idea. But, you’ll still get Nachos anyway.”
True. Dat. My weapon of choice at ANY event that serves a selection of terrible-for-you-but-oh-so-good food is NACHOS.
None of the chefs made nachos last night. I can’t really blame them. How do you make nachos fancy?
However, resident freak Amanda decided to make tuna tartar. As soon as she asked Angelo how to prep it, I thought: “Mandy. You in danger, girl.”
First of all: I can’t even imagine tuna tartar in Washington D.C. at a baseball game with the potential of humidity and a heat wave. Is this what really happened to Stephen Strasburg? Did he throw Amanda’s tartar across the stadium after eating one bite? Did he hurt himself in doing so? Tartar has no business at a stadium, UNLESS you are in a suite that has air conditioning and champagne.
Anyway, her tartar was gray. Gross. She was babbling on and on and on and on this entire episode. It’s as if Bravo wanted to give us every last bit of footage of Amanda so we could hold on to that image of her lip mole and her annoying “Nothing I ever make is every going to be good…WAHHHHHHHHH” inner monologue. Bitch, you made mac and cheese. LAEF makes mac and cheese. Don’t overextend yourself girlfriend.
Luckily for me, Amanda was sent packing, and I don’t have to bitchslap her on this blog anymore. My issue with Amanda is that she never seemed to know what she was doing. She was unfocused, scatterbrained and wasn’t able to conceptualize a dish. Ever. If you want to use tuna, then you better have an idea of something that you know you can make. Why are you asking Angelo how to prep the tuna? This is Top Chef, not culinary school.
Other notables from last night: Ed in Tiffany’s dress. What’s there to say other than it’s where he’s wanted to be all season? Is it going to be Tiffany versus Ed as the final two? Are they going to ride off to New Zealand together? Because combined, those two are racking up money and trips like nobody else.
Angelo: Somewhere along the line, Angelo took a turn. He’s clearly not the same person he was during the first 3 episodes. Honestly, I think he’s fucking with us. I think it’s a game to him at this point. He’s either not taking the competition seriously, or he has some Russian bride side issue that is hindering his ability to think clearly. I have no idea, but he’s not the frontrunner he once was. BTW, ick, ick, ick, ick. I do not want to see him in the doggy-style position talking in his sweet voice to his Russian fuck buddy. EW.
Tiffany: The next top chef? Soups and stews are her go-to, and she seems to nail flavor with every dish she puts out. If she has simple food, with great flavor, it’s likely she will cruise into the finals. It’s hard for me to buy her as the Top Chef, but she really does have an idea every week of what she wants to make, and every week she makes something that the judges like. Just, for the love of everything, do NOT let Ed in that dress. Ever.
Ed: Loved that he admitted he won a free trip to New Zealand for some annoying risotto balls.
Kelly: Angelo nailed it when he said she’s a fierce competitor, but that it’s subtle. She’s very cool, calm and collected (except when there are hot baseball players in her space…um, hello, who wouldn’t be!?) and I like the way she methodically handles every challenge, and the competiton as a whole. Another potential winner at this point.
Kevin: Meh. I’m not a Kevin fan. There’s nothing wrong with him, per se, he’s just not interesting or exciting at all.
I hope they serve food at Jets training camp next week. The challenge should be: Make something healthy for Cafe Ryan so that coach doesn’t get in trouble with the nutritionists or his wife.