Tales from La La Land

As I think about starting a new decade, I can’t help but think about all of the wonderful things that happened to me over the last 10 years. In short, I became an auntie four times over, I got married, I worked a wonderful job that allowed me to travel to Hawaii, Chicago, Miami and many places in between. I graduated from college.

I turned 30.

I lost some of my baggage.

And, I had a great group of friends who have been with me since the beginning of that decade.

That means, 10 years of memories. 10 years of good times and bad times. Many times of them holding my hand as I try to stagger home from Rennies. Many times of them wiping my tears while I cried over a broken relationship. Many times of tolerating my good sides and my bad sides.

Despite babies, weddings, moving, jobs and life’s general chaos, we have all remained in each others’ life.

So, it was the most perfect timing that the Oregon football team played in the Rose Bowl this year. A year that I happened to live in LA, and can actually afford to be a part of it. A year that doesn’t require me to buy a plane ticket anywhere, and where I can offer a small space in my tiny house for people who may not be able to come if hotel rooms were part of their travel expenses.

A year that allowed us to be together for the end of a decade that saw us through so many things together.

My last day of work was Friday, December 18. The very next night I was part of Lady Gaga’s little monster crew with my friend Annett in San Diego. I can’t think of a better way to start a two-week vacation than to scream every single Lady Gaga song while escaping from my reality for two hours. I dreamt of a life that was guided solely by my loves and inspirations. A life in which I could make a living doing things that I love.

Aside from inspiring me to sing Speechless at the top of my lungs for three days straight, she truly inspired me to think about what exactly it is that I love to do and trying to figure out a way to make that my reality.

I was still doing the little monster hand greeting as Laef and I headed up north to visit my family for Christmas. Thankfully, my nieces know what is up and actually enjoy dancing to Poker Face instead of whatever bullshit Miley Cyrus is putting out these days. (OK, I admit, I do secretly sing to Party in the U.S.A. if I hear it, but I can’t take her pole dancing and short black biker shorts).

After a few days with family, I headed back home to regroup and get ready for the Oregon peeps to arrive in LA for the Rose Bowl.

Even though our little house can barely handle Laef, Sanch and I, we had Chris and Alissa Hansen, my brother, and Amy Detwiler staying with us for a few days.

The Hansen’s were the first to arrive, coming in on Dec. 30. We took them downtown to Ercules in Manhattan Beach where we also met up with Michelle and Jeff Eberhart, Angie Sit and The McNamara’s.

For some reason Michelle kept saying that all she wanted was to be in the blog. But, I don’t know how to best explain to her that being in the blog usually means I make fun of you.

So this is what I will say about Michelle: She is the only grandma I know who wears knee-high boots with tassels. And, she is the craziest, most-fun 41-year 29-year old I know.

But, the line of the night goes to Chris Hansen.

I was talking about how I used to have a crush on this guy. And, it has recently been brought to my attention that said guy is “fat and bald”. I could barely contain my excitement over this new development when Chris said:

“So. He is fat? And bald? I am trying to figure out what is so wrong with that.”

We finished the night with some food and shots of Patron at Hennessey’s. It was a great way to start off the weekend.

The next day, New Year’s Eve, (OK, I need a minute. That seems like 4,980,343 brain cells ago) …

Ah, yes.

Chris, Alissa and I went to the UCLA men’s basketball to watch Laef in action. We tried to get him to do the “O” hand signal from the bench, but all we got was an eye roll. UCLA ended up holding on for a 2-point win over Arizona State so it was a good game to watch.

We raced back home to lay on the couch and watch The Hangover while re-energizing our already tired bodies. It’s amazing how two days of activities become much more difficult as life presses on.

Once Laef got home, the four of us headed to Sashi for our NYE dinner. It’s hard to put into words how amazing the meal was. The presentation of everything was so beautiful. The flavors were overwhelmingly good. Every bite seemed to have some larger purporse that left us baffled and wondering, “Exactly how does one come up with a Kobe Beef Cone thingy?” Or, “How do you make a red pepper ribbon?”

So, we not only ate, but we talked about food and took pictures and marveled at how decedent everything was.

Amy Detwiler and my brother arrived that night, and we decided to stay home so that we could be up early for the Rose Bowl. We sat around the table and played the dice game. That was until a car crashed into a utility pole near our house and the power went out.

What else to do but stand on the corner in sweatpants, with the neighbors, watching a car explode?

And, that my friends, is how we rang in 2010.

Seeing as the power was out, Laef and I were unable to inflate the air mattress that we were going to sleep on. So, we slept on a deflated air mattress with as many blankets as we could muster, and did not feel a day over 84 when we woke up.

It didn’t really matter because it was ROSE BOWL DAY!!!

I am not going to lie. I might have taken tailgating very seriously. I might have had one of the best days ever.

The game, as you might know, was a bummer. It wasn’t the Oregon offense we had seen for most of the year. It was frustrating to say the least.

I won’t say that it was a moral victory just being there. But, I will say, win or lose, I was taking in every bit of the experience in spite of fumbles, missed field goals and lack of possession time.

I met all sorts of people. The vibe was very pleasant. Duck fans seemed happy. OSU fans were very nice.

It was an amazing day.

It was the perfect end to a decade of memories with my peeps.

In case you’re living under a rock and didn’t know, Twitter has come up with this new feature called Twitter lists. It’s a way to organize all of the people you follow into separate lists. It’s genius, actually.

I quickly divided the people into various groups labeled “Food”, “TV”, “The Loves of My Life”, “Sports” and “TOOLS”.

It has been fun to see how other people label their lists. TOOLS refers to people I know in real life, have met in person, have gotten wasted with, have talked to on the phone, etc. Some of my friends have labeled this type of list as “Friends” or “People I know In Real Life” or “Tweeps” or “Peeps”.

The possibilities are endless.

“The Loves of My Life” include: Edward Norton, Coach Sark, Tom Colicchio, etc.

With my list obsession comes a problem though.

I CAN NOT STOP THINKING OF EVERY PERSON I KNOW AS @Laef or @Sanch.

Last night, Laef walked in the door from work and I wanted to tell him the following:

“Hey, so Kim and Amy will be here tomorrow around 8 and we’ll just stay in and then go to Sharks Cove tomorrow to watch the Oregon game.”

But, in my head it went something like this:

“Hey, so @KimDetwiler and @AmyDetwiler will be @ourhouse tomorrow around 8. We’ll just stay @ourhouse and then go to @SharksCove tomorrow to watch @OregonFootball.”

Seriously. I need @Twitter to get out of my head for one fucking second.

T.G.I.F.

GO DUCKS!

By the way, I have a huge bet with @mamaspohr, who is a USC grad (BARF).

Let’s just say that it would suck a very lot if I lose this bet.

Damon is probably going to be upset with that headline.

He played at Oregon, and I think he’s a Duck at heart. But, right now, he’s a coach at Boise State.

This is the second Q&A for DG, but my goal for this season was to try and have the Q&As relate to the game of the week. (I am already at a loss for Week 2 when Oregon plays Purdue, so if anyone has any ideas, let me know).

I asked him all new questions, and tried to get some sort of scoop.

It didn’t work. The Broncos are 64-2 on the blue turf since 1999. He dodged my question about how to cope with the blue, so there must be some sort of advantage that they use. Seriously, that is an insane stat.

Kirk Herbstreit gave the advantage to Boise State. But, he’s a pretty boy so his vote doesn’t count.

I can’t believe it’s game week. I live for college football season and am really excited to see what Chip Kelly brings to the table this season. I am planning to utilize my twitter during the games, which will be a new thing. I am sure I will regret that seeing as I tend to pop off pretty easily.

GO Ducks!!

1. Describe your thoughts heading into the first game? What is it like to coach against your alma mater where you have such fond memories? Honestly my thoughts are all over the place. I never been against the Ducks. I break it down like this: I will always be a Duck, but I’m married to the Broncos right now. And my father always told me a happy wife is a happy home.

2. Be honest. What color clothing will your daughters be wearing at the game? Honestly, it better be PJ’s. My two-year-old is too crazy to sit down for longer than 5 minutes. So we dont take her to the games.

3. How do you protect your eyes from staring at blue turf all year? Do you have special shades? I see what you are doing Allison, and it’s not going to work. But I like your style.

4. Can you give us Duckies a little sneak peak of your game plan? Maybe just the first 15 plays? Damn you are good. Well not sure if you know this, but I’m on the defensive side as a GA helping Justin Wilcox. I would assume the plan is to not let the very powerful Oregon offense score too many touchdown in those 15 plays.

5. Where is the (most likely) Duck friendly bar where we can celebrate our win? Right now probably my house is the friendliest. I’ve been so busy helping and trying to figure out how in the hell are we going to stop Masoli and Le Blount that we just drink ourselves to sleep in the office. So I don’t really know the bar scene yet.

6. Let’s talk about your time at Oregon. Can you recall a funny on-field moment that has stuck with you? Does that crazy hippie guy still slam the opposing teams mascot doll on the ground as the crowd counts the points? I don’t remember who we were playing but we scored like 60 on somebody and that dude was everywhere. First of all, where is the security? Second, he shouldn’t be allowed in the beer garden, that’s for sure. We always just laughed at the dude as he would go crazy slamming the doll.

7. Do you prefer Bellotti with ’stache or without ’stache? With Stache. I don’t know what it is, but unless you can’t grow a stache, I have a problem trusting you. Every man should have a stache!

8. Do you keep in touch with your former teammates? What do they say to you leading up to the season-opener? I keep up with a lot of guys. I just talked to Kenny Wheaton and I was trying to get him tickets, but I’m a GA and I only get two tickets, so you know those are gone. Mostly, the question is how do you feel about coaching against the Ducks, and its the same answer: “very uncomfortable”. And if the Broncos are for real, and I say, ‘well you saw what happen last year’, then they are a better team than last year. So it should be a good game.

9. Talk about your life after college? What have you been doing leading up to your current position at Boise State? Having two beautiful punk-ass lil girls. I say that because I can’t believe how beautiful they are and how they have me wrapped around their fingers even though they can’t talk yet. It’s really going to suck in the future! But, I wouldn’t change it for the world. Career-wise, I got my masters and am planning to become a Division-1 football coach in the near future.

10. What is your guilty pleasure television show? The Baby First channel because I’ve only seen my 4-month old for three weeks, and it if my baby girls are up, I know they are watching that show.

Most of the time when people meet Laef and I they fist-bump Laef.

This is usually in celebration of the fact that I am 8 years older than Laef.

Sometimes the male species is in awe of the fact that I like sports.

What they don’t know is that I only like to watch one sport on TV.

College Football.

(Sidenote: I will watch the NCAA Tournament and college softball, but most guys are not impressed by that).

I enjoy major league baseball.

When I am AT the actual stadium with a $9 beer and a hot dog.

I am trying to learn the rules of soccer so that I can understand what the fuck is going on. Based on how passionate soccer fans are, there’s got to be something to it.

The NFL is OK, but I am not nearly as excited for Sunday football as I am for Saturday football. I admit it. I watch my fantasy players and scream at the TV when they drop TD passes in the endzone. It’s too stressful for me.

So, anyway, we are t-minus 223 hours until the Oregon football season opener.

While I am somewhat pissed that the Duckies play on a Thursday, I am very excited to start posting on Rob’s blog , hunting down new people for my Q&As and drinking at noon on Saturday.

Here’s what I’ll be watching for this season:

1. Will Jeff Tedford (aka JT) do a Q&A for my blog? The guy doesn’t do anything except game-plan during the season. I think he probably sleeps 2 hours per night. OK, but seriously: Is Cal going to live up to the hype and win the Pac-10 this year? People seem to think that USC is down and that the Bears are the team that will win the crown.

2. What’s this Chip Kelly guy all about? When I think of Oregon football, it’s hard not to think of Coach Bellotti. He was there for so long. But, this year, there’s a new coach in town. Kelly seems to have a different approach and it will be interesting to see how that translates on the field.

3. Will my die-hard Cal friend Ben survive Autzen Stadium on Sept. 26? We’re heading to Eugene for the game – my first visit to Autzen since leaving Oregon almost 3 years ago. It’s a brutal place for visiting fans and players. I can’t wait to see how this game plays out. It might hold the key to who wins the Pac-10 title.

4. How many times will I have to watch a Tim Tebow press conference or read an article in SI about how he’s the second-coming of Michael Phelps Jesus?

5. How many Coronas and Mimosas will I need to get through each Saturday?

I guess that’s it for now. Check back Monday for the season’s first Q&A. It’s about a former Duck who will be very torn during Oregon’s season-opener at Boise State.

It’s about time for kickoff and Ben had to crack a beer to calm his nerves. Ben is a Cal Bears fan and I am a Duck fan.

And every year (with the exception of 2006 when Cal rolled in Berkeley) since my BF Jeff Tedford left for Cal, this game has been close. It has also had several interesting twist and turns, heartbreaking moments and drama that drives me to drink. Even more than I usually do on gameday.

For example:

2002: Tedford’s first season at Cal. The two teams don’t play each other. Which only builds the drama and tension for the first meeting in 2003 at Autzen.

2003: At Eugene. It’s a sleeper for the most part and is 10-7 in the fourth quarter. Then the lights go out in Autzen for 23 minutes. 23 MINUTES! I’m sure it wasn’t intentional as Oregon had the ball when the malfunction occurred, but it was a little shady and bush league for a program that has a gagillionaire as it’s biggest donor. Oregon went on to win by four points.

2004: At Cal. Two words. Keith. Allen. Oh wait. One more word. Drop. It’s no guarantee that Oregon would have made the field goal if he makes the catch, but it’s likely, right? Doesn’t matter, Oregon loses a heartbreaker 28-27.

2005: At Oregon. Out of timeouts, but with a chance to win in regulation with a field goal, Cal misses the 53-yarder, which results in overtime. The Ducks are down to their third-string quarterback (Brady Leaf), who hits James Finely for the game-winning TD.

2006: At Cal. The Bears come out in new yellow jersey’s, clearly poking at Oregon. They go on to roll Oregon. At least it was never stressful.

2007: At Eugene. Three words: Cameron. Colvin. Fumble. Ugh. Cal wins by seven.

So, for all of the people calling for a blowout today, I just can’t buy in. Not to mention, the weather is horrible. It’s going to be close with lots of drama. I will be updated throughout the game as I watch with a stressed-out Cal fan.

Update: There’s nothing to update. This game is sloppy, hard to watch and I believe Cal has more turnovers than Oregon has pass attempts.

OHHHH…So, those are the sexual innuendos you speak of with concern.

What I was actually trying to say is that, ahem, my fantasy football team is in first place in the league. I’m quickly writing this post before next week when I could potentially fall into a tie for first place. Still first. But ties are for boring Presidential debates.

I am 4-1 with a team comprised of what some may call riff-raff. I prefer to call them diamonds in the rough, sleepers (as in Kim K. is sleeping with them hence leading to great things) and over-achievers.

By the way, if you need proof, here it is. It really is necessary to click on the photo to clearly see the evidence.

Yeah, so I’m acting a little cocky, but I just thought I’d touch on a few things that Fantasy Football does to me when I’m actually in the running (um, when I’m 0-4 I don’t change my roster and other totally annoying things like that).

I can not tell you how many hours of my day are ruined when I decide to go with Jerricho Cotchery as opposed to Laveranues Coles and have to watch Brett Favre throw about 87 TD passes to Coles. Or, how I felt when my No. 1 pick, THE Tom Brady went out in the first game of the season. Or why Reggie Bush seems to rush for about 4 yards per game, but turns my mood by suddenly returning two punts for touchdowns or catching four passes for 1,000 yards?

My team has no rhyme or reason. How is it that I even have to debate between Cotchery and Coles and my boy has Randy Moss and suffers much more than I do each week? How is it that I had Eli Manning as my No. 2 QB after Brady and on Manning’s bye picked up Washington’s Jason Campbell?

I will just say this. I have decided to leave Santana Moss in the lineup this week and keep Cotchery on the bench. If Brett Favre even thinks about throwing to Cotchery as opposed to Coles, I will see to it that he is never issued another prescription of Viagra.

By the way, if you are wondering why Laef thought Homo was a good nickname, this is why.

Here’s a little tale from LaLa Land for ya.

I’ve been running on my lunch break this week. With the boss out of town and all of three people interacting with me, I figure it’s OK to be in sweaty running clothes for the second half of my day.

On Tuesday, I decided to venture out to a different part of Sunset Blvd. than I normally run. I wanted to see the sweet houses in Bel Air and just mix it up a bit. The problem with this area is that there are not really sidewalks. So, it’s dicey. LA drivers don’t exactly drive slow around turns.

No matter. I liked my new route so I went again yesterday.

As I came around a corner I saw a blonde in yellow mesh shorts, junk flinging, white UCLA sweat-soaked T-shirt and cheeks a hue of red that would make Rudolph question his job security.

Yes. I bumped into sweaty Rick Neuheisel on Sunset Blvd. wearing my most favorite Oregon T.

There were so many things I wanted to say, but didn’t. Hi. Hey. Love you. You look cute. Sorry about the shirt.

I relay the story to Laef and all he hears is “no sidewalks” and “almost hit by a car”.

Laef: “Dude! You should totally get hit by a car in Bel Air.”
Me: …
Laef: “Well, I mean not bad or anything. Just enough to sue for like $2 million dollars or something.”
Me: “How about, I get hit by a car, Ricky saves me, decides I should be his super-secret mistress and then gives me $2 million in hush money because another scandal would bury him?”
Laef: “Just stay on the running trails. And, you have some stray hairs growing out of your cheek.”
Me: “Thank you for bringing me back to reality. I appreciate it so.”

Well, I told you how my weekend started. It should have been a clue as to how the rest of the weekend would go.

We didn’t go out on Friday night because we were planning to spend Saturday at a bar watching football. So, we watched The Shining because as Laef pointed out, “I’ve never seen it. What was it like to be alive in 1980?”

Must be nice to be 26.

On Saturday, our normal bar for watching Duck games was not able to get the game on satellite. Which meant our only option was to watch the game on our computer through goducks.com. And, full-screen was not an option, so the three of us huddled around the computer for four hours.

Seeing as the Duckies were playing Utah State, I was bored within four minutes. But, at least we got to watch.

On Sunday, before I could even finish my coffee, Tom Brady went down with what appears to be a season-ending injury. This is a lovely bit of news considering he was my number 1 pick on my fantasy team. Yes, I do fantasy, please don’t write in and tell me I’m a nerd or a lesbian or a douche. I already know those things to be true. I do it because it’s always fun to beat boys at stuff they’re supposed to be better at. My brother had already told me that I had the worst team in the league, but Tom Brady was definitely the one thing I had going for me.

Luckily, I was playing Tim Malone’s team. Tim’s starting quarterback is Carson Palmer. Let me tell you how good Tom Brady is. Or rather, how shitty Carson Palmer is. Brady played for less than a quarter. He got me 3 points. Palmer played the entire game. He got Tim 2 points. So, I’m thinking of starting Brady again next week because he’ll probably be cuddling with Gisele in a swanky Greenwich Village loft, and in my book that’s worth at least 78 fantasy points.

After spending the afternoon at the beach and contemplating whether or not Reggie Bush can carry me this season, we headed home so that I could indulge myself in the MTV Video Music Awards. Luckily, Laef was playing some computer game where you make a cat purr. Yes, that’s what I said. I didn’t ask questions, because the longer he obsesses, the longer I get to watch without getting yelled at. Somehow it’s my fault that Lil’ Wayne wears his pants around his knees. Or that Britney Spears won three awards because MTV was proud of her for being able to sit through the show for four hours without eating a Cheeto.

I don’t know what happened, but the show was a trainwreck. I guess they wanted to follow the common theme of young Hollywood. There were so many awkward moments. Everyone seemed nervous, unsure of their lines, where the steps on the stage were and which camera to look into.

Another disappointment and four hours of my life I can never get back.

We did end things on a high note, indulging in some delicious grilled chicken and pesto pasta. I made the pesto from scratch with basil, pine nuts, garlic, olive oil and Parmesan cheese. Because it was my first time making this, it was kind of a hassle. There are a lot of elements — grilling chicken, cooking pasta and making the sauce, but if you’ve got time on a Sunday, it’s well worth it. Plus, anything with two cups of Parmesan cheese and 3/4 cup half ‘n half can’t miss. Not sure how this made it into Cooking Light, but who cares?

Courtesy of Cooking Light:

Ingredients

* 1 3/4 pounds skinless, boneless chicken breast halves
* 1 teaspoon salt, divided
* 3/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper, divided
* Cooking spray
* 20 ounces uncooked farfalle (bow tie pasta)
* 1 tablespoon butter
* 3 garlic cloves, minced
* 1 1/2 cups 1% low-fat milk, divided
* 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
* 1 (3.5-ounce) jar commercial pesto (about 1/3 cup)
* 3/4 cup half-and-half
* 2 cups (8 ounces) shredded fresh Parmesan cheese, divided
* 4 cups halved grape tomatoes (about 2 pints)
* 1/2 cup chopped fresh basil

Preparation

1. Prepare grill to medium-high heat.

2. Sprinkle chicken evenly with 1/4 teaspoon salt and 1/4 teaspoon pepper. Place chicken on grill rack coated with cooking spray; grill 10 minutes or until done, turning after 6 minutes. Remove from grill; let stand 5 minutes. Cut chicken into 1/2-inch pieces; keep warm.

3. Cook pasta according to package directions, omitting salt and fat. Drain in colander over a bowl, reserving 1/4 cup cooking liquid. Place pasta in large bowl.

4. Heat butter in a medium saucepan over medium heat. Add garlic to pan; cook 1 minute, stirring occasionally. Combine 1/2 cup milk and flour in a small bowl, stirring with a whisk. Add milk mixture to pan, stirring constantly with a whisk. Stir in pesto. Gradually add remaining 1 cup milk and half-and-half, stirring constantly with a whisk. Cook 8 minutes or until sauce thickens, stirring frequently. Add 1/4 cup reserved cooking liquid, remaining 3/4 teaspoon salt, remaining 1/2 teaspoon pepper, and 1 cup cheese; stir until cheese melts.

5. Add chicken and sauce to pasta, tossing well to coat. Add tomatoes and basil; toss gently. Sprinkle with remaining 1 cup cheese. Serve immediately.

There seems to be more to the story of Fenuki Tupou’s interaction with a sports agent, which led to him missing Oregon’s opener against Washington last week.

The story went that agent Tim Norling met with Fenuki in July, paid for his meal and also gave him $100 in cash. At some point, Fenuki decided to self-report the incident to Oregon’s compliance department, which then alerted the NCAA and the Pac-10 in an effort to avoid further infractions.

Today, Rob Moseley posted a letter that Norling submitted to the Register Guard in defense of his actions. He denies any sort of wrong-doing.

Reading the letter brought back one of my all-time low lights at Oregon. My first reaction in reading the letter from the agent was to believe him. Then I remembered my experience with an agent and realized that I still have a bad tendency to be naive.

After Joey went to the NFL he signed with an agency and I met his agent on more than one occasion. Joey often returned to Eugene to do press conferences about different things he was involved in and his agent always accompanied him.

Slowly, but surely, Joey’s agent began emailing me inquiring about some of Oregon’s senior players. I didn’t do anything more than ask the players if it was OK if I gave their cell phone number or email. Everything was fine until the agent asked about Igor Olshansky, who was a junior at the time.

I was hesitant, but the agent assured me more than once that he would not be trying to lure Igor away from Oregon, but he would be trying to encourage him to stay and refine his skills as a senior.

I know. How could I be so stupid? My point of view in believing him was simply this: Joey is the most stand up person I know. He trusts these people, picked them out of all the other agents and would never associate himself with horrible people.

Needless to say, a few weeks later, Coach Bellotti called me into his office. We had a great relationship, so I didn’t suspect anything. Let me just say that I have never seen him that angry. He was livid. Word had gotten to him from one of the other players that I had given an agent Igor’s number.

Coach Bellotti explained to me that they have a hard enough time keeping agents away from their players without having to worry about people on the inside betraying that trust.

For two days I thought I was going to get fired. This is one of the things in my life that I’m least proud of. I still feel icky in some way knowing that I allowed them to take advantage of me in that way. I feel guilty about it to this day.

After he had time to cool off, Coach Bellotti met with me again to explain what agents do and some parts of the business that I simply did not understand. I was young, naive and totally stupid to think that I could believe these people.

Once I realized how serious it was, I cut off all contact with the agent. But, let me tell you, it was not easy. They sent many more emails and texts trying to keep me in their back pocket. So, I can imagine that once Fenuki got caught up, it was hard to get out of it.

In reading the letter from Norling to the Register Guard, he seems very sincere in his denial. But, the bottom line is that somewhere in this, they were both wrong in some way. It’s so easy for agents to slowly incorporate themselves in. But, it’s not easy to get out of it. And, before the player realizes it, some small violation has probably taken place.

And, by the way. Igor left before his senior year. They never had any intentions of encouraging him to stay. They just wanted first crack at him.

P.S. Dear Coach Bellotti: Thank you for not firing me.

I’m sure I’ll take some heat for cheering on UCLA this season. But, it pays the bills so I think I’m entitled to attend the games in a baby blue shirt if I feel so inclined. Yes, when Oregon plays UCLA, I’m rooting for Oregon.

I’m a chick (despite what some might think) so I like juicy story lines. I like exciting people who bring drama to college football. Which is why I am liking this whole Rick Neuheisel decision at UCLA. If nothing else, he already made it exciting by claiming “The Football Monopoly in LA is Over.”

That, my friends, is ballsy. And, I am not sure if Ricky watched USC on Saturday, but he might want to tone it down just a notch.

Everything about Monday’s game was perfect. The weather, the fans (Tennesse fans were quite nice, although, I don’t think they ever thought UCLA had a chance so they were probably being nice to us the same way that Duck fans are nice to Oregon State fans) and the outcome.

UCLA fans were happy. One in particular.

It is possible, however, that that dance was cotton candy induced.

By the way. Remember how I mentioned Dr. Lou spit on me through my TV on Saturday? Well, on Monday night we were one row behind the Tennessee bench and Lou really did spit on me.

Anyway, the game was perfect. And, then this happened:

Wait. Do I look better like this?:

‘

Wait. Wait! Take another one of me with the flag in the background!

Needless to say, The Rickster wasted no time seizing the moment and putting himself on display for everyone to see. As Jason Bellamy pointed out: He was wearing golf shoes. He was also wearing a sweater vest and his signature “just had sex” red cheeks.

His postgame love-fest with the fans was self-serving in a way that he has mastered. UCLA completed it by turning off all the lights in the Rose Bowl, lighting fireworks and playing Hail To The Chief.

I guess he’s the new President of … something. I am not sure what. It was borderline disgusting, but it sure wasn’t boring. Jason also pointed out that he probably has a mirror above his bed. I’m starting to think this could be true.

He made it through Week 1 and got to do it at home in LA. He’ll get to be the star for today. We’ll see if the monopoly really is over. I’m sure Pete Carroll is loving every minute of this.

Maybe Kenny Wheaton was on to something. Drama like this was built for television.

Anyway, here’s my best sports photographer picture of the night. Go-ahead TD in the fourth quarter: